Sunday, November 29, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
OOOOOOO what a day.....
Well, i had a bad day up until 2:30 and then it got REALLY good.
But, I probably should use up your precious time talking about nothing that really has anything to do with you. Or should I? Talk about useful wasting of time. LOL!
WELL, We went to Fonders to get milk, and then we stayed longer and talked with NORMAl balanced kids around my age, a year younger a couple years younger and then the two youngest girls watched toby for a while...which was a greatly needed reprive. But of course you don't even need to be told, the two I was with most were the two boys.....lol. You know me!
Anywhooooo, So well first we tossed a tennis ball around....then....here comes the good part, are you on the edge of your seat? Well. It does get better so you should hang on for dear life. Now, I'm not sure what your thinking but I'm thinking something amazing.
.....
...
I finaly got to work today, i helped them clean out mangers! I am so happy about it. Pretty dreary to you but fascinating to me and I have missed working on a farm so much so this awesome. Sorry to lead you on but I was having so much fun.
Si thats it for my amazing day and i know it doesn't sound all that amazing but you kinda gotta be in my shoes to understand.
Here's the joke.
I am starting an 'Out of the mouth's of Babes' Marathon, prepare to laugh hard.
Ketchup
A mother was struggling to get the ketchup out of the bottle when the phone rang. She asked her four year old daughter to answer it. She heard her daughter say, "Mommy can't come to the phone. She's hitting the bottle."
Gotta love kids.
But, I probably should use up your precious time talking about nothing that really has anything to do with you. Or should I? Talk about useful wasting of time. LOL!
WELL, We went to Fonders to get milk, and then we stayed longer and talked with NORMAl balanced kids around my age, a year younger a couple years younger and then the two youngest girls watched toby for a while...which was a greatly needed reprive. But of course you don't even need to be told, the two I was with most were the two boys.....lol. You know me!
Anywhooooo, So well first we tossed a tennis ball around....then....here comes the good part, are you on the edge of your seat? Well. It does get better so you should hang on for dear life. Now, I'm not sure what your thinking but I'm thinking something amazing.
.....
...
I finaly got to work today, i helped them clean out mangers! I am so happy about it. Pretty dreary to you but fascinating to me and I have missed working on a farm so much so this awesome. Sorry to lead you on but I was having so much fun.
Si thats it for my amazing day and i know it doesn't sound all that amazing but you kinda gotta be in my shoes to understand.
Here's the joke.
I am starting an 'Out of the mouth's of Babes' Marathon, prepare to laugh hard.
Ketchup
A mother was struggling to get the ketchup out of the bottle when the phone rang. She asked her four year old daughter to answer it. She heard her daughter say, "Mommy can't come to the phone. She's hitting the bottle."
Gotta love kids.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Here I am again....
Who here has had a bad day? I have, I think the worst day of my life was this year. I can't think of the best day of my life, I think it is yet to come when my dad dies...or if...idk. But what brought this on was the most hysterical joke I have read in a long time. I am going to put it on here and I am not responsible for any....umm....anything that might happen during this soon to be laughing fit.
The Following was seen in a Florida newspaper:
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the house in the kitchen.
The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through glass patio doors and with the motorcycle, was dumped onto the floor inside the house.
The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found her husband lying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle laying next to him and the patio door shattered.
The wife ran to the phone and summoned an ambulance.
Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps, to the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the hospital, the wife uprights the motorcycle and pushes it outside.
Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some paper towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet.
The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come home.
After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went in to the bathroom, and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, He flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering burns on his butt and the backs of his legs. The wife ran to a phone and called for an ambulance.
The same ambulance crew were dispatched and the wife met them at the street.
The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they were going down to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned hinself. She told them, and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher and dumped the husband out.
He fell down the remaining steps and broke his arm.
This story redefines what it is to have a bad day.
FOMCLMBO!!!!!!!!
I was laughing so hard when i first read this....i feel bad for the poor guy but, that is SUCH a bad day you have to laugh.
The Following was seen in a Florida newspaper:
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the house in the kitchen.
The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through glass patio doors and with the motorcycle, was dumped onto the floor inside the house.
The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found her husband lying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle laying next to him and the patio door shattered.
The wife ran to the phone and summoned an ambulance.
Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps, to the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the hospital, the wife uprights the motorcycle and pushes it outside.
Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some paper towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet.
The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come home.
After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went in to the bathroom, and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, He flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering burns on his butt and the backs of his legs. The wife ran to a phone and called for an ambulance.
The same ambulance crew were dispatched and the wife met them at the street.
The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they were going down to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned hinself. She told them, and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher and dumped the husband out.
He fell down the remaining steps and broke his arm.
This story redefines what it is to have a bad day.
FOMCLMBO!!!!!!!!
I was laughing so hard when i first read this....i feel bad for the poor guy but, that is SUCH a bad day you have to laugh.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
WHOAH, long time no post.
Hellooo everyone!
Today is about America. I have three words to say; God Help Us.
Fox news needs to shut their traps before they scare everybody into a hole!
"You have to stand for something otherwise you'll fall for anything."
That saying makes a lot of sense, but, you can stand for something and still fall for anything. If you are a person who likes drama and would rather hear all the bad about a person instead of weighing what you hear and making your own choice, you will fall for every hoax and lie out there. You need a balance. I have a balance. I listen to people, and then decide if its something I am willing to believe or not.
I loved it when Obama's speech came out. OH BOY, i was laughing so hard at some people, and shaking my head at others. That was no brainwashing speech, that was an encouraging speech. JEEZ, some people are SO blind and deaf, i can explain that speech, you know, what the heck was a president supposed to say to a bunch of kids, "Hey kid, go play video games instead of doing your homework!" HES NOT GOING TO SAY THAT! So instead, he says keep up good work, this country needs you, we need educated people. America needs you. Stay in school, don't focus on your failures, focus on doing better next time.
Boy, that sure is a brainwashing speech, hes telling your kids to stay in school, to do good. And the right wing maniacs go ballistic because they can't have people seeing what a good thing that it so they go and put the little seed of fear into people hearts by saying hes brainwashing your kids. I mean, HOW DUMB DO THEY THINK I AM??????????? People have made the huge mistake of thinking I'm dumb, and they got BURNT. So, if you try to tell me that Obama is a Gay, Terroristic satanist, I'm going to have to bust a gut. Because my friends, I am not your average dummy, I may have blond moments, I may not be great at math, but I am not stupid.
The Government is pretty smart. They know we aren't paying a whole lot of attention to the war. They know we aren't thinking about it in detail. What we have here is another Viet-Nam. People say that the only reason we lost Viet-Nam was because of politics. The whole Viet-Nam war was about politics. So here we are fighting against better prepared people that know that mountains and were getting bombed left and right. We need to get WAY smarter, we need to lay roadside bombs, we need to get a map of the mountain and work on it, we need to FIGHT! Were like sitting ducks!
Can you tell I'm mad?
WELL I AM VERY MAD. This dad-gum Government it wasting our money!!!!!!!!!!!!
well ill try to find a joke.
Forest Gump and St.Peter
When Forest Gump died, he stood in front of St.Peter at the Pearly Gates. St.Peter said "Welcome, Forest. We've heard a lot about you." He continued, "Unfortunately, It's getting pretty crowded up here and we find that we have to give an intrance examination before we let them in."
"Okay," Said Forest. "I hope it's not too hard. I've already been through a test. My Momma used to say 'Life is like a final exam, it's hard.' "
"Yes, Forest, I know. But this tes is only three questions. Here they are."
1) Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'?
2) How many seconds are in a year?
3) What is God's first name?
"Well, sir," Said Forest, "The first one is easy. Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'? Today and Tomorrow."
St. Peter looked supprised and said "Well, that wasn't the answer I was looking for, but you have a point. I give you credit for that answer.
"The next question," Said Forest, "How many seconds are in a year? Twelve."
"Twelve?" Said St.Peter, supprised and confussed.
"Yes, sir. January 2nd, Febuary 2nd, March 2nd....."
St.Peter interupted him. "I see what you mean. I'll have to give you credit for that one, too."
"And the last question," said Forest, "What is God's first name? It's Andy."
"Andy?" Said St.Peter, in shock. How did you come up with 'Andy'?"
"I learned it in Church. We used to sing about it. Forest broke into song, "Andy walks with me, Andy talks wiht me, Andy tells me I am His own."
St.Peter opened the gate to Forest and said, "Run, Forest, Run!"
LOL
Today is about America. I have three words to say; God Help Us.
Fox news needs to shut their traps before they scare everybody into a hole!
"You have to stand for something otherwise you'll fall for anything."
That saying makes a lot of sense, but, you can stand for something and still fall for anything. If you are a person who likes drama and would rather hear all the bad about a person instead of weighing what you hear and making your own choice, you will fall for every hoax and lie out there. You need a balance. I have a balance. I listen to people, and then decide if its something I am willing to believe or not.
I loved it when Obama's speech came out. OH BOY, i was laughing so hard at some people, and shaking my head at others. That was no brainwashing speech, that was an encouraging speech. JEEZ, some people are SO blind and deaf, i can explain that speech, you know, what the heck was a president supposed to say to a bunch of kids, "Hey kid, go play video games instead of doing your homework!" HES NOT GOING TO SAY THAT! So instead, he says keep up good work, this country needs you, we need educated people. America needs you. Stay in school, don't focus on your failures, focus on doing better next time.
Boy, that sure is a brainwashing speech, hes telling your kids to stay in school, to do good. And the right wing maniacs go ballistic because they can't have people seeing what a good thing that it so they go and put the little seed of fear into people hearts by saying hes brainwashing your kids. I mean, HOW DUMB DO THEY THINK I AM??????????? People have made the huge mistake of thinking I'm dumb, and they got BURNT. So, if you try to tell me that Obama is a Gay, Terroristic satanist, I'm going to have to bust a gut. Because my friends, I am not your average dummy, I may have blond moments, I may not be great at math, but I am not stupid.
The Government is pretty smart. They know we aren't paying a whole lot of attention to the war. They know we aren't thinking about it in detail. What we have here is another Viet-Nam. People say that the only reason we lost Viet-Nam was because of politics. The whole Viet-Nam war was about politics. So here we are fighting against better prepared people that know that mountains and were getting bombed left and right. We need to get WAY smarter, we need to lay roadside bombs, we need to get a map of the mountain and work on it, we need to FIGHT! Were like sitting ducks!
Can you tell I'm mad?
WELL I AM VERY MAD. This dad-gum Government it wasting our money!!!!!!!!!!!!
well ill try to find a joke.
Forest Gump and St.Peter
When Forest Gump died, he stood in front of St.Peter at the Pearly Gates. St.Peter said "Welcome, Forest. We've heard a lot about you." He continued, "Unfortunately, It's getting pretty crowded up here and we find that we have to give an intrance examination before we let them in."
"Okay," Said Forest. "I hope it's not too hard. I've already been through a test. My Momma used to say 'Life is like a final exam, it's hard.' "
"Yes, Forest, I know. But this tes is only three questions. Here they are."
1) Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'?
2) How many seconds are in a year?
3) What is God's first name?
"Well, sir," Said Forest, "The first one is easy. Which two days of the week begin with the letter 'T'? Today and Tomorrow."
St. Peter looked supprised and said "Well, that wasn't the answer I was looking for, but you have a point. I give you credit for that answer.
"The next question," Said Forest, "How many seconds are in a year? Twelve."
"Twelve?" Said St.Peter, supprised and confussed.
"Yes, sir. January 2nd, Febuary 2nd, March 2nd....."
St.Peter interupted him. "I see what you mean. I'll have to give you credit for that one, too."
"And the last question," said Forest, "What is God's first name? It's Andy."
"Andy?" Said St.Peter, in shock. How did you come up with 'Andy'?"
"I learned it in Church. We used to sing about it. Forest broke into song, "Andy walks with me, Andy talks wiht me, Andy tells me I am His own."
St.Peter opened the gate to Forest and said, "Run, Forest, Run!"
LOL
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Work over-load...
I say over-load because I had been working on school since before ten this moring and then i babysat from 12-5, I am tired...believe it or not. I was so exhausted today, when i was babaysitting, like the jokes I'm going to out up, it all had to do with 'murphy's law' I was tired so then the house had to be so nice and quiet and comfortable, of course it was only quiet at the end when I had managed to get them calmed down and in a nice inside voice. It was cloudy today so then the house was kinda on the dim lighting, the kind where it is SO easy to fall asleep in.
ANYWHOOOO.......my weekend went AWESOME!!! I...I....I mean....uhh....I mean, I had absolutely NO fun WHAT SO EVER...yeah...thats what I meant.
I had absouteky no fun seeing Lynette and NO fun hanging with Kelly. So summing it up i had a pretty sucky weekend.
Can anyone hear the sarcasm in my vioce?
If you can't, your DEAF!
Take everything I said and turn it around.
I am so bored right now, well sorta, I am listening to 'With Six You Get Egg-Roll', it is HYSTERICAL! You have GOT to check it out. It is.....really, really, REALLY funny. Well I'm going to sign off with some great stuff.
~CC~
Law of Mechanical RepairAfter your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch and/or you'll have to pee.
Law of the WorkshopAny tool, when dropped, will roll or slide to the least accessible corner.
Law of probabilityThe probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the AlibiIf you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Law of VariationIf you change traffic lanes or lines at the store, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the ResultWhen you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of LockersIf there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Logical ArgumentAnything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.(My brother-in-law has proved this many times.)
Wilson's LawAs soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
Law of the TelephoneWhen you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of Hot CoffeeAs soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, you will be inspired (by youself or, more likely, your boss) to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Law of Window CleaningIt's on the other side.
Law of Fixing or ReplacementIf it jams...force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Theorem of Making Things FitIf it doesn't fit, use a hammer.If it still doesn't fit, use a sledge hammer.
The Dimensions DilemnaDimensions will always be expressed in the least useable terms. For example, velocity will be expressed in furlongs/fortnight.
Law of Universal FitInterchangeable parts won't (or don't?).
Law of Anxious UnpackingThe assembly and operation manual will be discarded with the packing material. The garbage truck will have it picked up five minutes before the mad dash to the rubbish can.
Axiom: The Carpenter's Rule "Measure Twice, Cut Once" Doesn't Apply to ElectriciansAny wire cut to the exact measured length will be too short.
God in action. Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
The Axiom of Near vs Far: Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure.
TTYL
ANYWHOOOO.......my weekend went AWESOME!!! I...I....I mean....uhh....I mean, I had absolutely NO fun WHAT SO EVER...yeah...thats what I meant.
I had absouteky no fun seeing Lynette and NO fun hanging with Kelly. So summing it up i had a pretty sucky weekend.
Can anyone hear the sarcasm in my vioce?
If you can't, your DEAF!
Take everything I said and turn it around.
I am so bored right now, well sorta, I am listening to 'With Six You Get Egg-Roll', it is HYSTERICAL! You have GOT to check it out. It is.....really, really, REALLY funny. Well I'm going to sign off with some great stuff.
~CC~
Law of Mechanical RepairAfter your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch and/or you'll have to pee.
Law of the WorkshopAny tool, when dropped, will roll or slide to the least accessible corner.
Law of probabilityThe probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the AlibiIf you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.
Law of VariationIf you change traffic lanes or lines at the store, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the ResultWhen you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of LockersIf there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Logical ArgumentAnything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.(My brother-in-law has proved this many times.)
Wilson's LawAs soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
Law of the TelephoneWhen you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Law of Hot CoffeeAs soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, you will be inspired (by youself or, more likely, your boss) to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Law of Window CleaningIt's on the other side.
Law of Fixing or ReplacementIf it jams...force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Theorem of Making Things FitIf it doesn't fit, use a hammer.If it still doesn't fit, use a sledge hammer.
The Dimensions DilemnaDimensions will always be expressed in the least useable terms. For example, velocity will be expressed in furlongs/fortnight.
Law of Universal FitInterchangeable parts won't (or don't?).
Law of Anxious UnpackingThe assembly and operation manual will be discarded with the packing material. The garbage truck will have it picked up five minutes before the mad dash to the rubbish can.
Axiom: The Carpenter's Rule "Measure Twice, Cut Once" Doesn't Apply to ElectriciansAny wire cut to the exact measured length will be too short.
God in action. Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
The Axiom of Near vs Far: Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure.
TTYL
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