Friday, October 30, 2009

Ahhhhhhhhh......sweet freedom...

Why do I title this 'Sweet freedom'? WELL, because freedom is sweet and if it weren't for our Soldiers and Police Officers, we would be.....not free.

So today since I have nothing to important to write about I am going to ramble on and on, eventually maybe, if I'm lucky, I just might end up with a tribute to our Soldiers and Police Officers, remember, IF I'm that lucky, LOL.

We are so lucky. We have great and brave people out on the street for us. We have people who willingly work the streets for us so we can go home safely for the most part.

We have Soldiers who fight for our freedom, through RPG's, land mines, snipers, sand storms, and horrible heat. Soldiers who are going up against other soldiers who know that land, know the mountains and know how to use it to their best advantage. They see things just about everyday that are so horrible we can't even imagine. I read a story one time about a guy in Viet-Nam who saw a guy burst into flames from Na-palm (or however you spell it). They see their buddy's get shot down, or blown up. These pretty faces in America who are turned into icon's or 'Hero's', they don't do anything for us really they give us entertainment or maybe hope, but they will die someday, their face will probably go up on some sorta of wall or into the hall of fame. But these Soldiers who die fighting for us, and our freedom, they don't get as much plublicity as Angelina Jolie who had an affair with Brad Pitt and adopts kids and makes movies. How worthwhile is that??? Adopting kids isn't a bad thing, its a great thing, but compared to what our Soldiers are doing on the other side of the world, I would praise those Soldiers fifty times more. I love my freedom, and I love my friends and family. Just think about those Soldiers who get sent off to boot camp, and then off to a war that they probably don't even agree with, but they go because they have something to fight for.
Well, I have been rambling on for long enough, I will sign off with a joke.
OVER AND OUT! ~CC~

A preacher was completing a temperance sermon; with great expression he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river."

With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I would take it and throw it into the river."

And then finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world I'd take it and throw it into the river."

He sat down.

The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, "For our closing song let us sing Hymn # 365: "Shall We Gather at the River."


OMG WOW, I was laughing SO HARD!!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009

Less is sometimes more....

I love that. But when parent's use that phrase its usually against what you want. Well I was thinking yesterday.....weird right? ANYWAY, I was thinking of how us kids might be able to use that phrase to our own liking. And I came up with a BRILLIANT one. 'Less is More', so I guess less school work is more....right? And the reverse of that one is 'More is Less' so then that also can be interpreted into school. More school work is less learning....get it? I love it. If only parent's would agree with us.

Today is Monday so therefore I 'get' to work. Notice my choice of words? Well Saturday i was NOT looking forward to working, I was sulking because I hated working by myself having to listen to the most ridiculous conversations I have EVER heard. So Momma Told me something Opa used to say. "Smile and make people wonder what you up to." So every time I wasn't liking what I was doing, I just smiled. AND IT WORKED...well on my part anyway, I'm not sure if it made people wonder what I was up to, but I sure felt better. I looked at things more humorously, like one of the guys hadn't heard a custome right and so when they figured out what she was asking, they kinda laughed it off a bit, but I was trying to exercise my self-control a bit because it was SO funny. I think it was a 'You had to be there' kind of things.

Know what I like about these jokes I put up? I odn't expect you to really know, it was more of a retorical question. I LOVE those! What I like about them is that......I don't know, The Carstianity was a bit confusing in one place, but if you don't redognize the cars it's pobably more confusing. But then Seventeenth Chapter was just all out HYSTERICAL. And that preacher one....I wasn't expecting that ending but I thought it was pretty good. Today I am going to try my best to get a SUPER SUPER hysterical one on here. I don't know what I'll come up with but I can try can't I?

Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

1. Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

2. Announcement in a church bulletin for a national PRAYER & FASTING Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

3. The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."
4. Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall - Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
5. Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.
6. The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict.
7. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.
8. Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
9. Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
10. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
11. Next Thursday there will be try outs for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
12. Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.
13. The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: " Break Forth Into Joy."

14. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

15. A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

16. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

17. Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

18. Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

19. Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

20. Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.

LOL!!!!!!!!
~GEM~

Saturday, October 17, 2009

WORK, work, work......I'm over-worked and underpaid..

*SIGH* I went to work today at bills. It can be such a trying job. I mean, things falling off and over. I HATE CANS! I am the only girl that works freight and so i have to listen to teenage guy's being dorks....gotta love it. I am going to explain how things go. The guy's work on an isle with at least 3-4 guys....sometimes up to 5 or 6. Very ridiculous. So 3 or 4 guys were working in isle three and I was in 4. I got the privilege to listen to the most idiotic sentences that I have ever heard. One of the guys was bragging about how hes gotten five hours of sleep and how he want to go home. So one of the other guys was saying "IT'S SATURDAY!" so those two go back and forth with some of the other chiming in saying "IT'S SATURDAY!" or "I KNOW IT'S SATURDAY!" And in my mind I'm going...."OH my GOSH...REALLY?? WHO'DA THUNK!!!" I was about to bust a gut for how stupid that conversation was.
If it doesn't hit your funny bone, its one of those times you just had to be there to get it.
I Finally got my time card...it's fun. LOL!
Last night had gone to brush my teeth and both Buddy and George were already in my room, well I got back to my room and Buddy was on my bed...BAD DOG. Well, I pulled him off (litteraly) the bed, well Buddy being the dummy he was, hadn't noticed that George had gotten ahold of the bone and was chewing on it. Well when Buddy got off, he noticed and got after George. I was FLABBERGASTED......I had been pretty patient with him...more than normal...so I was over being patient, when i got to Buddy after that he went wagging to ME! THE INCOLENCE! As you can tell my patience with him was gone after that.

I'm going to change the subject. I am listening to Momma talk to Oma and their talking about Harrison and that last Friday, my birthday.
I wasn't there as much as Harrison wanted me. I was always off having fun doing my own thing. Momma tells me about how a lot of times he wanted me and then how I would leave earlier than he wanted. I wasn't there for his blood drive, or when they went shooting, or his BMT. I feel so bad about it. All the important times he went through I wasn't there cheering him on. I remember how that last Friday he was so forgettful. I had come acn seen him and talked to him. I left to RMH fo a little bit and he had forgotten I had been there. But he didn't forget it was my birthday.

I miss him so much. I used to always get mad because he was ALWAYS making the shooting noise or some othe thing and I just wanted it to be quiet. Now its TOO quiet. We used to have a trick we would play on people. If I picked up the phone and said "Hello." and something else, I would give him a signal and he would do some talking, then he would give me the signal and I would do the talking. Nobody but once in a while momma if she got a lucky guess, would be able to know that it was both Harrison and I, even our own dad couldn't tell us apart on the phone. It was so fun, we would be busting a gut while trying to not give it away, sometimes it was too much and we would foil it by laughing.
One of the times we were coming back from Souix Falls after one of his visits, we had Harrison's friend Taylor along and the three of us were sitting in the back seat playing a game and i said to Harrison "Get it, Got it GOOD!" well, Harrison would have these REALLY brilliant funny moments and he said "Dont get it, SURE don't got it, and it AIN'T good!!". I had been play acting as if i was mad at him and none of us expected that retort. It was such a 'Harrison' thing to do.
WELL I have been writing fo a while so I will part with a joke.
TTYL
~GEM~
Sam: Would you punish me for some thing I didn't do?
Teacher: no, of course not.
Sam: good, because I didn't do my homework.
LOL!!!!

Friday, October 16, 2009

One day late.....

I wasn't able to put one up yesterday so I might just talk a WHOLE bunch this time ;).

JK, I don't talk a whole lot unless I have something to say or explain......or do I? That's the real question on my mind: Do I talk a lot?
I'm not sure I want to know what you think but I might take a chance, My curiosity usually does get me into trouble. So, personally, I don't think that I talk a lot unless i have something to say or upset about something.

SO, onto a lighter note. I am watching 'Three Men and A Little Lady', and it is the FUNNIEST movie. It's a sequel to 'Three Men and a Baby', which is the first FUNNIEST movie of all time. ALSO, a ghost showed up in it. It was the son of one of the lady's working on the movie. VERY interesting. One of the few times that a ghost has been captured on a movie. I don't really have a lot to say today so I will part on a happy note.


Vow of Silence
At a remote monastery deep in the woods, the monks followed a rigid vow of silence. This vow could only be broken once a year on Christmas, by one monk, and the monk could speak only one sentence. One Christmas, Brother Thomas had his turn to speak and said, "I love the delightful mashed potatoes we have every year with the Christmas roast!" Then he sat down. Silence ensued for 365 days. The next Christmas, Brother Michael got his turn, and said, "I think the mashed potatoes are lumpy and I truly despise them!" Once again, silence ensued for 365 days. The following Christmas, Brother Paul rose and said, "I am fed up with this constant bickering!"

How's that? LOL!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

WHEW...Today is finaly almost over...

WELL...this morning started better than yesterday and I managed to remember to feed both the fish and the dogs in the morning....which reminds me....be right back...I gotta feed the dogs :D .
O.K. BACK. WHEW WEE...its cold and slushy outside. The poor puppy dogs are wet. I think I'm going to have compassion on them and forgive them their downfalls...LOL. I mean, forgive and forget, "Dodge and be not Dodged" RIGHT???? HAHA, I couldn't resist that. If you don't understand go to the second post's joke, a little bit confusing in some places but very amusing. Reminding me about that joke. I think I might reform to Carstianity. It's almost just like talking with an accent.
For news about today:
I am making a monthly menu, so that we can make a budget and yadda yadda...so on and so forth....ect. I have made plans for four weeks worth of menu's. I try not to have the same meal twice in one week. So it took a long time and then when i was in the middle of the third menu I was/am so sick of thinking about food that I was starting to FEEL SICK! It was like a broken record...mac and cheese, pancakes, eggs, toast, oat meal. It is so sickening to think about food to eat WEEKS ahead of time....I feel sick just thinking about thinking about food. It's a real delimma....at least i have a month covered and I won't have to do this for another four weeks. I wrote a couple things on the carringbridge today and so one was a joke ( the same one I did on the first post.) and the other two were "Dumb Criminals". I will write one on here for you to enjoy. And when I say "Dumb Criminals" I use that term VERY lightly.
#1. this one makes me laugh the hardest.
CAUGHT WITH HIS PANTS DOWN
Jay Mitchel, 27, successfully robbed a shop in the Old Town district of Albequerque, N.M., in March, 1980. However, he encountered trouble during his escape when his pants fell down, causing him to fall. He dropped his pistol and some jewelry but was able to flee the scene in a stolen truck. About an hour later, the pistol was reported by a woman who lived in the same building as Mitchell. When police arrived, they spotted the truck as well as Mitchell himself. Mitchell was taken into custody for questioning, but the police knew they had their man when his pants fell down again on the way to the police car. Mitchell subsequently pleaded guilty to the robbery.
OH MY GOSH!!!! LOL!!!
And here is the usual joke:

THE RETIRED PREACHER
A preacher retired and moved to the country to enjoy life and practice his hobby of yard work. Needing a lawn mower, he headed into town to buy one. On the way he saw a sign advertising a lawn mower for sale. He stopped at the house and a young lad came out to greet him. The preacher asked about the lawn mower and the kid said it was behind the house. The two went to look at the lawn mower. The engine was sputtering along at idle speed. The preacher increased the speed of the engine and mowed a few strips. Satisfied that the mower would do the job they settled on a price of $25.00.Later in the day, the young lad was riding his bicycle when he spied the preacher pulling on the engine starter rope. The kid stopped and watched for a couple of minutes. He asked, "What's wrong?" The reply came, "I can't get this mower started. Do you know how?"The kid said, "Yep.""Well, how do you do it? Tell me!", the preacher yelled.The kid replied, "You have to cuss it."The preacher rose up indignantly. "Now you listen here. I am a preacher and if I ever did cuss, not saying I have, I've forgotten how to do it after all these years." With a wise look on his face well beyond his years, the kid said, "Preacher, you keep on pulling that rope and it'll all come back to ya."
LOL! HAVE A GREAT NIGHT!

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Famous Last words:

I have been reading the 'Cat Who' books and in this one that I'm reading right now, every so often Qwill (main character) mentions famous last words. So, here are a couple I thought of:
"Oh, he's perfectly bomb-proof...."
"I'd NEVER do THAT....."
"It's impossible for me to do something that clumsy....."

Please add your own in the comments!!!

How many of you have young dogs? Those of you that do, know what a perfect pest they can be?And so darn cute about it? Anyway...last night I had the dogs in my room and Buddy's not allowed up on the bed. SO, he takes his front two paws and places them RIGHT by my head. causing me to wake up, well I'm half in and out of sleep so I'm trying to shove a 80 pound dog off my bed while half asleep and with one hand. Well he wouldn't budge so...with one hand....I would try and shove one paw off at a time...doesn't work to well. Every time I got one paw off and was working on the next he'd put that other paw back on as soon as I got the other one off. AND THEN....I also had George up in my room so he doesn't lift his leg on everything during the night...anyway....Buddy tried to get him to play during the night, on TWO occasions. So that was my misery for today.
JOKE TIME!!!

Carstianity
"Haul a Yugo. Haul a Yugo.
Gearly beloved, we are Blazered here in the name of our Four-door, who art in Half-ton.

I'm speaking of our lord and Mazda, Jeep-sus Chrysler.

He is the Alfa and the Romeo.

He was born in a Ranger, he was Tempo'd by the DeVille, and he Daihatsu'd for your Sentras.

He said, "Dodge not, that ye not be Dodged.

Thou shalt not Corvette thy neighbor's Whitewall, but turn the other Cherokee.

If ye have Fiat ye can move Montecarlos.

He ain't Chevy, he's my Beretta.

He ate the Last Supra, and he climbed the mount of Cavalier, where they Cruise-controlled him on the Motocross.

But God, in his Infiniti Mercedes, did Rolls away the Stanza.

Let us Prelude: Sayeth the prophet Isuzu, in the Dusenburg Bible, In the 23rd Saab, "The Ford is my Chauffeur. I shall not Walk.

He Lexus me in the paths of Right-turn-signals.

Yea, though I walk through the Valet of the Shadow of Dart, I shall Fiero no Eagle.Subaru Goo dwrench and Mercury shall Volvo me Audi Daytonas of my life, and I shall Dwellmeter house of Delorean, Four-cylinder.
Gloria, In Ex-Celica Geo!"

Now, was that WHACK OR WHAT???? LOL!!!

Monday, October 12, 2009

OH MY..............WOW!!!

I can't believe it, the twelfth of October and we have.....wait for it...wait for it.....SNOW!!!! OF ALL THINGS!!!
I'm not all that big on snow in the first place and yesterday had been so nice. So i wake up this morning to find the Christmas day kind of snow on the ground...very pretty but very annoying...I'm not ready for cold or snow or winter. Every winter I wonder why I still want to live in Minnesota and then spring comes, with the blue sky's and the spring air and then comes the birds hatching and the foals and calves being born...and through that all I manage to fall in love with Minnesota all over again. So all through the winter I rant and rave inside my head about Minnesota and how unpredictable the weather is. Then spring and summer come and I forget about it, then comes winter and I start all over again.

Thankfully, it all melted but then the dogs were wet. and poor George was cold and he has short hair so I brought him up to my room. My room REEKED like wet dog...who'da thunk right? Well it did...so Igot a nice can of Febreeze and sprayed my room as if it smelled like a skunk died in there....smelled pretty good afterwards.

So after i told you about my 'excitement' for the day. I now welcome you to my blogspot. hope you enjoy it. Oh, and i will try to put a joke on everyday. so here's todays 'Joke of the day'

Seventeenth Chapter

A Sunday school teacher was giving her class the assignment for the next week. "Next Sunday," she said, "we are going to talk about liars, and in preparation for our lesson I want you all to read the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark."The following week, at the beginning of the class meeting, the teacher said, "Now then, all of you who have prepared for the lesson by reading the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark, please step to the front of the room."About half the class rose and came forward."The rest of you may leave," said the teacher, "these students are the ones I want to talk to. There is no Seventeenth Chapter in the Book of Mark."